Pain Demands
by ObsessiveCompulsiveFanboy777
Summary: Gus and Issac both love each other but don't know, but will they ever be able to love each other, when everything seems to get in their way. This Fanfiction is set before the trip to Amsterdam, when Hazels request to go is denied. Any mention of love between Hazel and Augustus before then, I have ignored in this Fanfic. Rated M for mentions of smut, language and other adult themes.
1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1

Isaac's POV

I walked down the usual steps to Gus' basement room. All I can think is 'soon I won't be able to see this room anymore'. This broke me to tears, and without realising, I lost my balance and fell down the two remaining steps. Gus was sat on his bed re-reading An Imperial Affliction, but quickly stood up and ran over to my side. "Woah dude, you okay there", and then he must have seen the tears streaming down my face. "Whats wrong?" He asked inquisitively. I was so overcome with sadness that I only managed a weak sentence "This world... This house... This room... You! I'll never be able to see you again Gus! You know how much that breaks me. It makes me feel..." But before I could finish, he pulled me into an embrace "Dude, it's okay, it's not like I'm completely disappearing". He sits me up, and I look into his eyes. Those captivating blue eyes of his. We stay there for what feels like forever, him looking at me and me looking at him. He finally pulls me up and I struggle to walk over to the game chairs he has set up in front of his tv. We sit and play Counter Insurgence for hours, but then my mom rings saying dinner will be ready soon. Gus walks upstairs first, me following. I say goodbye to his parents then walk to his door. There's an awkward bro hug shared between us, then I start rushing down his driveway, to my car over the road.

Augustus' POV

I hope he feels the same way, I mean, our little stare off was quite intimate, but that isn't a tick in the "I like like you too" box. I suddenly realise that he's kicking my ass at Counter Insurgence, so I used my pro techniques to get back at him. He sighs as he pulls out his phone, "Mom wants me back, she's making Beef Lasagne, and I can't exactly miss that". I smile at that, knowing his moms lasagne is disgusting. I walk up the stairs, listen to my mom get emotional saying that they'll wish well for his eye surgery, and then I give him a hug goodbye, trying to add as much testosterone into it to cover up my true feelings. All I can think about when he walks away is how I'll look into his blind eyes, and say hello to the new Issac. I'm so caught up in my thoughts, I only just see it happen. He wasn't looking, and the car was going so fast. It came out of nowhere, speeding round the corner and hitting Issac dead on, sending him flying across the street. The car sped off, but not before I screamed "ISSAC!". I sprinted, as much as I could with one leg, over to his stiff body. I pick him up and hold him in my arms, still screaming. I try everything, from screaming in his face to hitting his face gently. I seemed like a lifetime before the ambulance finally arrived. My parents had came out to console me, trying to make me let go of his limp body, but I refused. I stayed with him in the ambulance. Through the hospital corridors, until I was forced to stay put in the emergency waiting room.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2

Hazel's POV

I woke up without even realising I had fell to sleep. I was just sat on my laptop, and my little pet dragon must have hummed me to sleep. I realised that what had woken me up was my phone, and I reached out to grab it off my bedside table. It was Augustus. His text read "Hazel Grace, I need your help". I couldn't help but smile, thinking of what adventure he'd want me to accompany him on. I text back, "Why?". I took a while for him to answer, just four words that almost made me feel like I was drowning. "Get to the hospital". My heart sank, as my mind quickly ran through the endless possibilities of what could be wrong. I quickly got up and rushed downstairs, not bothering to change out my lazy clothes. My dad was sat watching something about the secret life of bears, while my mom was making salad in the kitchen. "The hospital" I called out, and they both ran over to me. "What's wrong?", "Are you okay Hazel?", "Do I need to call doctor Scott?". "No no no no!" I shouted back at the questions being fired at me. "Gus just text, he needs me there, now!" My mom quickly ran and slipped her shoes on, got the car keys from the mantlepiece, and was almost in the car as quick as I was. We drove as quick as the traffic would let us, passing a super speeding driver on he way, who looked like he had blood on his bumper, but I tried not to think about it. I only cared about Augustus' safety. He needs to be safe. He needs to be. As soon as we reach the hospital, we parked in our special spot, and ran (as fast as you can run with an oxygen tank holding you back) , into the reception. I was so glad to see Gus sat there, safe, no harm whatsoever. I gave a huge sigh as I hugged him. "What is it, what's wrong?" I speedily asked him. He took a while to answer, but ended up spurting out "Issac, he was hit... By a car... I don't know what happened... I don't", but before he could burst into tears I hugged him so tightly, like my life depended on it. Time passed and we ended up waiting in the emergency waiting room for 2 hours before we got any news. Mom had already drove home, told Dad, and rushed back. The nurse came out of the operating theatre. Augustus stood up straight away, causing me to sway slightly, as I was using him as a cushion. "He's alive, but he's suffered from some head injuries, and a couple of fractured bones here and there" Gus let out a huge sigh of relief. "So he will survive?" He asked inquisitively. "Yes, but there's some bad news". "Tell us then", I was already at Gus' side. "With the injuries he's inflicted, we cannot risk doing his eye surgery any time soon, with the possibility that we could further damage his skull". I gasped, knowing that Issac wanted, no, needed that surgery. "And there's more" I looked up in disbelief. " I'm afraid your friend is in a coma"

Issac's POV

My head hurts like a bitch. Like a bitch being crushed by a hindered tones of titanium. Okay maybe I'm a bit over reacting. I open my eyes to see my mom, sat crying over my bed. I go to call to her, but I can't. My voice isn't working, neither are my hands, or feet. I go to scream, but I can't. What's happening, why Isn't my mom noticing me. I then see Augustus, and he's... Kissing Hazel. I look around, I'm not in my bed anymore, I'm floating in darkness, and all I can see is them, just making out in front of me. No, I don't want this. This isn't supposed to be happening. "No!" I scream, and they finally notice me. But they don't react how I imagine, instead they start laughing at me, and then continue their kissing. Suddenly the scene changes, and Monica's there. We're sat outside the little Italian on the corner we always go to. Always. I see her sat I front of me, but I don't feel like I normally feel around her. I feel out of place, uncomfortable. Then, she changes and morphs, into Gus. I smile when I see his face, and suddenly I feel at home, happy. After dinner, we walk down to the bridge we normally sit on and try and throw stones at passing ducks. Before I know it, I'm the one making out with him, but it didn't feel strange, or weird, it felt nice. Before I could do anything, I suddenly felt my body thrust backwards, and I hit the lake water. The scene then changes to a basement. Not just any basement, Gus' basement. I gasp when I realise we are on his bed, him on top of me, trailing kisses down my neck, my chest, then...


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER 3

Augustus' POV

After spending almost an hour over Issacs hospital bed, Me and Hazel headed back to hers. We both sat on the pedophile swing, and I felt like I should make a joke, but I can't, not now. I pull out a cigarette and place it between my teeth. "I'm sorry", Hazel said in a compassionate voice. "For what?" I ask. "Well, you know, Issac", "Bloody hell Hazel he's not dead, just an accident, he'll be back soon...soon". I just realised how angry my tone was with her, and I felt like I should apologise, but I can't bring myself to. "What's really wrong" , she asked suddenly. "What do you mean", I ask confused. "Listen, I've known you long enough now to tell when you're okay, or when something is wrong with you, and something IS wrong with you, and it's certainly not Issac". I felt ashamed, I should have told her earlier, but I couldn't do it. I've had so many girls fall for me, but I can never get past 'second base', and I can't for a reason. I suddenly said to her, "Listen, I know you like me. It's actually quite obvious, but what I want you to know, is that I can't love you back, ever.". She looked stunned, like someone had just slapped her right in the face. "Wh...Why?", and then, I was the bravest I had ever been in my whole life. "Because I like, him". Hazel looked startled. "Who?", "Issac". The world then fell silent. After a while, she finally spoke. "So, you're what, like...?", and I immediately recoiled to the statement. "I'm not gay!" I shouted. She looked puzzled, "But if you're not, then what, are you Bisexual, Pansexual?". "I don't know, I just know I like him okay, and not just as friends". She looked shocked for a second, but then the ends of her mouth curled up into a smile, and she started laughing. "Wh...What?" I questioned her, as I did not expect this reaction. "I totally ship you two!" She shouted out, giggling and clapping her hands quickly. "What the hell is 'ship'" I asked with a grin, glad she can accept this. "Doesn't matter!" She squealed, "You need to get with him!". My mood dropped once again, "I can't, remember". Her mood suddenly dropped, and she looked at the ground as if ashamed with herself, but her head lifted again with a mischievous grin. "Then we need to get you ready for when he wakes up"

Hazel's POV

I ran back into my house after Gus had left, over joyed I had an almost gay best friend. I sprinted into my front room, but not to see the scene I had expected. Plates were smashed on the floor, Moms favourite flowers were dead on the floor, the tv screen was cracked and it looked like someone had flipped the sofa. In the middle of the room, sat crying with her legs crossed, was Mom. I carefully approached her, and quietly asked "again?". Mom and Dad had been fighting for a while, I didn't know what about, but there had been multiple times I heard a plate smash or a loud bang, but it had never gotten this bad. "I should have told you" she sobbed "I should of asked him and told you and then this would have gone to" "Ssshhhh" I whispered into her ear, stroking her hair like would normally do when I cried. After a while, she had calmed down, and I needed to know. "What did you not tell me?". She looked at me with hurt eyes, took a deep breath, and came out with it. "I got pregnant again, and I didn't want to tell you I case you felt like you were being replaced." I was shocked. "Replaced" I stuttered out. "Mom, you could never make me feel replaced, I've had you for 16 years, and hopefully for however long I have left, and you are amazing. To have another child experience that would be the best. And I've always wanted another sibling" I smiled at her, but then she started crying her eyes out. "Woah", I hugged her, "It's okay, it's okay". "No it's not!" she shouted, and I flinched back a small bit, scared of her sudden anger. "I got rid of it, Hazel, it's gone!". I was so shocked that I flinched back even more. The pieces of the puzzle fitted together. That's why Dad flipped out, since Dad always talked about having another child, and he was so close as well. "An abortion?" I asked gingerly. "Yes Hazel... An... Abortion". I felt like being sick, like screaming at her, like crying. She knew my views on abortions, even if they weren't religious, I despised them. Lives were so precious, meant to be living, meant to be experienced, not ripped away before even entering the world. I stood up, facing her, feeling all my anger explode. "I'm glad Dad left" I said angrily, "and I'm glad I'll be leaving before you, because then I don't have to go to your pathetic funeral". I stormed out the front door, into my car, and drove away, not bothering to look back. Before I knew it I was crying, and I was on the way to Gus' house somehow subconsciously. I parked on the street, and walked up the usual path to his house. He opened the door, smiling, then he must have seen the tears running down my face. "Woah, what's wrong?" He asked, but I didn't have the strength to talk about it, I just cried more, and so he let me in. "Go to my room, and I'll make us nachos, okay?" He asked, but I still didn't have the strength to answer or talk, so I just nodded. I was on the third step, when I heard the microwave turn on, and I suddenly fell. My tank went first, painfully pulling the nubs from my nose and skin, making me silently scream. I went down after it, tumbling down to land more than an arms length away from it. I expected Gus to come running down, but I realised the mixed sound of the microwave and the tv his parents were watching must have deafened my fall. I layed in extreme pain, gasping for air. I tried shuffling for my tank and nubs, but my ribs prevented me from, making me silently scream in pain once more. I stayed, reaching for my oxygen. I slowly felt whatever breath I once had leave my body, and everything slowly turned black.


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry if this is a bit short, I will be uploading the next chapter soon :)**

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CHAPTER 4

Hazel's Mom's POV

I took the card from the mantle piece that HE got me, and I opened it. In big marker pen, I written a note to my baby Hazel, crying. I then took the kitchen knife I use to cut up their Sunday roast, and bring it to my wrists. I'm crying out waterfalls, almost screaming because of what I'm about to do. Everything reminds me of them, my dear family. Goodbye. I cut my skin in multiple lines, a bloody criss cross pattern. My blood drips out onto the wooden floor, I do the same with my other wrists, and even my legs. I'm crying as I feel myself slowly slipping away. Away from this cruel cruel world.

Augustus's POV

I hear the ringing of the microwave. "Nachos are done, Hazel Grace!" I call down to my room, but I get no answer. I have the suspicion she's fell asleep in my room, again. I get the nachos out and pour them in a cool bowl. I then proceed to walk down the steps to my room when I realise the lifeless figure at the bottom of them. I drop the bowl on the floor and it smashes, sending pieces of pottery and nachos everywhere. I run down to Hazel, and realise I'm doing it again, holding a limp body in my hands, screaming their names. I grab her nubs, and quickly stick them in her nose. I'm rocking her, hitting her face gently. Before I know it, my parents have called an ambulance, And they're telling me to let go of her. Carefully, I hand her over, and they rush her out. I don't even have to ask, my dad is already in the car, ready to once again drop me off at the hospital.


	5. Chapter 5

**Here's the new chapter! Enjoy!**

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CHAPTER 5

This chapter is set a week after the events with Hazel

Issac's POV

I feel groggy and stiff, and my eyes are heavy. I hear a beeping of a heart monitor, and a steady breath, which I manage to recognize as Augustus'. I open my eyes slowly, to see him with his head in his hands, looking stressed. "Gus", I call out, but her runs to my side and holds my hand. It's the best feeling ever. He sits for a while smiling, holding my hands, then says his first words. "A week", he said quietly. I was confused, "what?", I asked. He sucked up some air, and I prepared myself for whatever news will come. "You've been in a coma for a week since Disaster Day". I'm so shocked. A week? A coma? Disaster Day? He can tell I'm confused, so he explains it slowly. "When you got hit by the car, it sent you into a coma. You've been in the coma for a week now. Disaster Day was when you got hit by a car, Hazel almost died, and Hazels mom... Well...". It was a lot to take in. I remember being hit with a really strong force, which must have been the car, and then more must have happened. "What do you mean Hazel almost died?", I asked worryingly curious. "Well, she fell down by bloody stairs", he looked annoyed with himself, "And then her Mom, well, she got super depressed, and when my Dad went round, he found her on the floor, her... Wrists open... Dead". If I had the power to gasp I would, but I just sat with my mouth open". "Where is Hazel now?" I ask. "She's in this hospital, just staying over for a bit until she gains more energy. She lost quite a lot of whatever breath she had, so they're trying to replace it somehow." He looked depressed. "But, you're awake, and that's all that matters". We sit and hold hands for a while, then suddenly he bring his lips to mine and were kissing. I'm enjoying it, and trying to kiss back, but my whole body hurts. He pulls back before I can do anything, and starts nervously pacing. "I shouldn't have done that" He said, which mildly insulted me. "No, I liked it" I responded. He gives me serious stare, then returns to my bedside and were making out again.

Hazels POV

It's all too much. My mum. Issac waking up. Gus having to deal with it all. God, he must be going through hell. I sit back, and cry for the hundredth time, which the nurses must be sick of. I just can't understand why, my mum, she would. I'm suddenly puking in the bucket the nurses put beside my bed, another habit apart from crying, is puking. Once I've gained control over myself again, Julie, my nurse comes in with what looks like a birthday card. I realize its the card Dad got Mum for her birthday, and I wonder why Julie is giving me this. I only understand when I look inside. On the blank left side, there was a message which read " I'm so sorry Hazel, I'm a murderer. I have killed an innocent life. I'm a horrible human being who doesn't deserve to live. I'm so sorry Hazel. Goodbye". I could no longer handle it. Julie had left me to handle the note on my own, thinking it would help, but it made me feel lonelier. I wish Gus would come back, but of course he won't, he's with the person he loves. Dad probably doesn't even know I'm in hospital. Everyone has left me alone. I don't know what to do. I'm panicking. It hurts my lungs. I can here the beeping of my heart monitor, but the sound of it is muffled. I'm slipping away again, but this time its heavier than before. Its getting darker, and darker, and dar...ker...


End file.
